Pressure: Bae for LIFE!

Hello you people reading.. Brace yourselves for this rant that you are about to waste the coming few minutes on!!

Every being on earth has a tough life obviously cause that’s the bloody essence to survive, okay I get it BUT why do other things like: Time, Age, MONEY, Geography, Emotional Parents, and other freaking people who you don’t even know have to add to this already so tough life of yours that you are struggling to live?! Why? Just whhyy…

I come from a moderately conservative family, and I am very much okay with that. I was always allowed to do what I wish but with T&C’s lol, which is fair okay I get the worries. But when I am being such a nice person understanding all that, Why am I taken for granted? for being so understanding? It should be the other way around, I should be more trusted and allowed to make decisions that obviously are reliable and practical. However, that sadly isn’t the case. So do you get the level of frustration a person who is sensible with average IQ and BIG FAT DREAMS/AIMS/GOALS, has to undergo for no real reason? Like seriously!

You finish school, finish university and even grad school for what bruv? to freaking get a career not the ones of the millionaires but reach at a fair level you have worked so hard for. All these years you wait to reach this stage when you slog to find a job and settle down career wise. But NO, it’s time to get married, be a wife and start a family…Yuhhuu What fun! (no offence maybe it’s fun and is a dream for some, but not mine at the moment). Oh when you say no to that, You apparently have never ever followed your family or society or the freaking way of life. Like whaaat??!! Apparently anything you wish to do, you can do it after Marriage with your Husband! Yay that seems so possible…

And the best part, you don’t even get a job why? cause the market is down. Sure bruv you can be down and low as it can get but why now? and why you taking forever? Doesn’t the economy have 1 freakin job (or 2, for ma friend too). Anybody at this situation would move out and look elsewhere or maybe enjoy the vacay! But Na’a moving out is a huge step for you and the only next step is to be wife (woot woot). Okay so you try to destress by meeting your friends, shopping or any other thing you would do which will obviously cost you and make you spend them bucks on, but Hello hold on dahling! Your bank account is on freaking maternity leave!

Now you are drowning with emotions, but positive tumblr life quotes got you! Your optimist bar just rises and some nobody; your neighbor, or a relative who had been MIA all their life comes into the scene all so alarmed trying to save your life gives these oh so wise advices to you and family about how my age isn’t proportionate to what I’m doing with my life. ‘You need to settle down soon, your parents need a break’, ‘Just do some job for now anyway you gonna be home multitasking household chores’, ‘You won’t find good guys if you delay so much’, ‘Don’t know why her parents even listen to her, kids delay but they must know’ – People! I understand how worried you are about me, I really appreciated your non-existence in my life before so let’s maintain that in future too!

So you are in your bed going through insta and checking out vlogs on Youtube, and you hear mumbling from the other room. Who them? My family, Saying what? How they are so worried about me (which basically is my marriage). Like if you all haven’t got it yet – Marriage is what I was born for peeps! *emoji with the shades on*. Okay so I understand that has been yours and every other person’s dream to get me married HURRAY! But hold on a tad bit, it won’t harm you for sure I know!

It’s so simple, yet so hard for anybody to understand that – Marriage, Job, Family and Death (lol) doesn’t need a specific time, location, age, financial status, or societal pressure to be scheduled in one’s life! If I’m happy and I feel I’m settled then I’m obviously open to how others want to take the wheel of my life. Right now I’m not, how hard is it to see that Ya’ll? Stop this pressure, give it time. Let us figure out life first, just stop this unhappy cribbing for a while! It’s so uncalled for.. On one side (online) you see these posts about Feminism and Career Success and on the other side (the reality) you are literally fighting amongst so many emotions and killing yourself inside. The worst part, it’s not because of you that you are in this stress.. It’s the people, the pressures they bring into your life. When will this stop?! I can go on and on ranting, but I know the next minute I post this I’m going back to the physics of life – trying to position my age and life stage at equilibrium. Byyee..

 

Image Source: disney.wikia.com

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“There was a time I believed in luck and signs”

“Yes, this is it. I am changing my thinking. I am changing myself “, is something you hear quite often when a new year comes. And this year I took some time to analyze something about me – My Thinking / My Thinking Process. 

There was once a time I believed in luck and signs, but as always when you grow older your perceptions change and your mind gets introduced to different worlds and wider perspectives. This made me change into “science-believer” , I started trusted my instincts on practical thinking and practical solutions.

There is actually nothing like proving yourself with facts that led you to situations you face or overcame. The understanding of whys and hows – just that feeling of believing that you know you CAN change your mind, your decisions and the way you take actions. But recently, sole scientific thinking hasn’t helped much. My mind fell everywhere. I had so many practical solutions to my problems that I couldn’t find a solutions suitable to MY feelings, MY ability and MY emotional balance. Being practical does make you realize the FACTS. It does helps reality to slap you in the face and say – “get your hopes low – plan your future and get those actions done!” . And so I, had let myself down. I didn’t think I needed the balance then. Instead of learning to balance two kinds of thinking processes – I chose one from another. I chose to let go of the luck-based-emotional thinking (A-thinking) behind and I followed the action-based emotional thinking (B-thinking).
 Very-little-is-needed-to-make-a-happy-life-quotes
Unfortunately, it’s not a game for your mind to take sides on which type of thinking should be chosen or not – or if chosen it would be more successful than the other. And then you begin to realize, tweaking our mind process to your wish does not NECESSARILY get you a “re-start” to life. It is unfortunately and yet again, all about striking a mental  and emotional balance.
  1. You need that strength to create those actions and a source of faith to keep you committed – also you do really, really really, really, REALLY need to trust yourself.
  2. You as an individual would need BOTH in very fixed quantities that switch only in the level of priority, depending on your situation. At a given moment, you may need A-thinking over B-thinking, and at another time it would be vise-versa.
And so I’m off.
(Coming, from someone who may speak and write what is right, but might just be living the opposite.)
-Arunya
“It’s your life-but only if you make it so.” 
― Eleanor Roosevelt