Pressure: Bae for LIFE!

Hello you people reading.. Brace yourselves for this rant that you are about to waste the coming few minutes on!!

Every being on earth has a tough life obviously cause that’s the bloody essence to survive, okay I get it BUT why do other things like: Time, Age, MONEY, Geography, Emotional Parents, and other freaking people who you don’t even know have to add to this already so tough life of yours that you are struggling to live?! Why? Just whhyy…

I come from a moderately conservative family, and I am very much okay with that. I was always allowed to do what I wish but with T&C’s lol, which is fair okay I get the worries. But when I am being such a nice person understanding all that, Why am I taken for granted? for being so understanding? It should be the other way around, I should be more trusted and allowed to make decisions that obviously are reliable and practical. However, that sadly isn’t the case. So do you get the level of frustration a person who is sensible with average IQ and BIG FAT DREAMS/AIMS/GOALS, has to undergo for no real reason? Like seriously!

You finish school, finish university and even grad school for what bruv? to freaking get a career not the ones of the millionaires but reach at a fair level you have worked so hard for. All these years you wait to reach this stage when you slog to find a job and settle down career wise. But NO, it’s time to get married, be a wife and start a family…Yuhhuu What fun! (no offence maybe it’s fun and is a dream for some, but not mine at the moment). Oh when you say no to that, You apparently have never ever followed your family or society or the freaking way of life. Like whaaat??!! Apparently anything you wish to do, you can do it after Marriage with your Husband! Yay that seems so possible…

And the best part, you don’t even get a job why? cause the market is down. Sure bruv you can be down and low as it can get but why now? and why you taking forever? Doesn’t the economy have 1 freakin job (or 2, for ma friend too). Anybody at this situation would move out and look elsewhere or maybe enjoy the vacay! But Na’a moving out is a huge step for you and the only next step is to be wife (woot woot). Okay so you try to destress by meeting your friends, shopping or any other thing you would do which will obviously cost you and make you spend them bucks on, but Hello hold on dahling! Your bank account is on freaking maternity leave!

Now you are drowning with emotions, but positive tumblr life quotes got you! Your optimist bar just rises and some nobody; your neighbor, or a relative who had been MIA all their life comes into the scene all so alarmed trying to save your life gives these oh so wise advices to you and family about how my age isn’t proportionate to what I’m doing with my life. ‘You need to settle down soon, your parents need a break’, ‘Just do some job for now anyway you gonna be home multitasking household chores’, ‘You won’t find good guys if you delay so much’, ‘Don’t know why her parents even listen to her, kids delay but they must know’ – People! I understand how worried you are about me, I really appreciated your non-existence in my life before so let’s maintain that in future too!

So you are in your bed going through insta and checking out vlogs on Youtube, and you hear mumbling from the other room. Who them? My family, Saying what? How they are so worried about me (which basically is my marriage). Like if you all haven’t got it yet – Marriage is what I was born for peeps! *emoji with the shades on*. Okay so I understand that has been yours and every other person’s dream to get me married HURRAY! But hold on a tad bit, it won’t harm you for sure I know!

It’s so simple, yet so hard for anybody to understand that – Marriage, Job, Family and Death (lol) doesn’t need a specific time, location, age, financial status, or societal pressure to be scheduled in one’s life! If I’m happy and I feel I’m settled then I’m obviously open to how others want to take the wheel of my life. Right now I’m not, how hard is it to see that Ya’ll? Stop this pressure, give it time. Let us figure out life first, just stop this unhappy cribbing for a while! It’s so uncalled for.. On one side (online) you see these posts about Feminism and Career Success and on the other side (the reality) you are literally fighting amongst so many emotions and killing yourself inside. The worst part, it’s not because of you that you are in this stress.. It’s the people, the pressures they bring into your life. When will this stop?! I can go on and on ranting, but I know the next minute I post this I’m going back to the physics of life – trying to position my age and life stage at equilibrium. Byyee..

 

Image Source: disney.wikia.com

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A little bit more.

Whatever you  do, you “need to be a little bit more”. I have been having this thought of how we are either being pushed or being told to ‘be a little bit more’. This is in regard to ‘a better you’ context.

Alright, in one way the idea is all about personal development and is for the betterment of your being, but what if that is just a social pressure that is silently damaging what we are as a person and our character. I’ve got no scientific research or philosophical proof of how exactly we are manipulated by our environment, but it’s obvious that we definitely are being pushed and pulled towards the perceptions of either individuals or the media.

Why do I have to listen to them?

It’s not even the general idea of being a better person – it’s the intricate details that these individuals and media go through. From the tiniest ways to live your life to get on a quest for major life changing decisions – why do you want me to listen to you? Why am I told to always be more than now?

 -No better you than the you that you are- (1)

Recent song release that got me thinking :

“No better you than the you that you are”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em7vc8NWUNY

What you do is never enough.

Alright, so you come to a conclusion to change, just be a little more ‘open ears’ and listen to them. You understand their point and ‘try’ to change and you succeed too, but guess what, that’s not enough. You should do more. You should try harder. Apparently, the effort you made now is just tiny compared to what you should be doing – based on what the WORLD is doing. Why is that a concern – why are you telling me it should be MY concern? Can’t MY efforts be enough to satisfy MY goals? – nope, we just have to try harder.

“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.”

The flip side

Remain calm, if it meant to be it will happen. Like, what now? After all the messages about trying harder and takings efforts to be better, now you tell me to just remain calm? Please media, make up your mind.

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On a serious note, I don’t think I can find an apt solutions to the weariness of this unbalance of having to ‘strive better’ and having to ‘be happy with at where you are’ – it does, of course differ based on your personal situation but the concern is – we are clung on to social media so much that before we start to understand if the message is personally relevant to us or not, we are already ready with conclusions.

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Until next time..xxx