Pressure: Bae for LIFE!

Hello you people reading.. Brace yourselves for this rant that you are about to waste the coming few minutes on!!

Every being on earth has a tough life obviously cause that’s the bloody essence to survive, okay I get it BUT why do other things like: Time, Age, MONEY, Geography, Emotional Parents, and other freaking people who you don’t even know have to add to this already so tough life of yours that you are struggling to live?! Why? Just whhyy…

I come from a moderately conservative family, and I am very much okay with that. I was always allowed to do what I wish but with T&C’s lol, which is fair okay I get the worries. But when I am being such a nice person understanding all that, Why am I taken for granted? for being so understanding? It should be the other way around, I should be more trusted and allowed to make decisions that obviously are reliable and practical. However, that sadly isn’t the case. So do you get the level of frustration a person who is sensible with average IQ and BIG FAT DREAMS/AIMS/GOALS, has to undergo for no real reason? Like seriously!

You finish school, finish university and even grad school for what bruv? to freaking get a career not the ones of the millionaires but reach at a fair level you have worked so hard for. All these years you wait to reach this stage when you slog to find a job and settle down career wise. But NO, it’s time to get married, be a wife and start a family…Yuhhuu What fun! (no offence maybe it’s fun and is a dream for some, but not mine at the moment). Oh when you say no to that, You apparently have never ever followed your family or society or the freaking way of life. Like whaaat??!! Apparently anything you wish to do, you can do it after Marriage with your Husband! Yay that seems so possible…

And the best part, you don’t even get a job why? cause the market is down. Sure bruv you can be down and low as it can get but why now? and why you taking forever? Doesn’t the economy have 1 freakin job (or 2, for ma friend too). Anybody at this situation would move out and look elsewhere or maybe enjoy the vacay! But Na’a moving out is a huge step for you and the only next step is to be wife (woot woot). Okay so you try to destress by meeting your friends, shopping or any other thing you would do which will obviously cost you and make you spend them bucks on, but Hello hold on dahling! Your bank account is on freaking maternity leave!

Now you are drowning with emotions, but positive tumblr life quotes got you! Your optimist bar just rises and some nobody; your neighbor, or a relative who had been MIA all their life comes into the scene all so alarmed trying to save your life gives these oh so wise advices to you and family about how my age isn’t proportionate to what I’m doing with my life. ‘You need to settle down soon, your parents need a break’, ‘Just do some job for now anyway you gonna be home multitasking household chores’, ‘You won’t find good guys if you delay so much’, ‘Don’t know why her parents even listen to her, kids delay but they must know’ – People! I understand how worried you are about me, I really appreciated your non-existence in my life before so let’s maintain that in future too!

So you are in your bed going through insta and checking out vlogs on Youtube, and you hear mumbling from the other room. Who them? My family, Saying what? How they are so worried about me (which basically is my marriage). Like if you all haven’t got it yet – Marriage is what I was born for peeps! *emoji with the shades on*. Okay so I understand that has been yours and every other person’s dream to get me married HURRAY! But hold on a tad bit, it won’t harm you for sure I know!

It’s so simple, yet so hard for anybody to understand that – Marriage, Job, Family and Death (lol) doesn’t need a specific time, location, age, financial status, or societal pressure to be scheduled in one’s life! If I’m happy and I feel I’m settled then I’m obviously open to how others want to take the wheel of my life. Right now I’m not, how hard is it to see that Ya’ll? Stop this pressure, give it time. Let us figure out life first, just stop this unhappy cribbing for a while! It’s so uncalled for.. On one side (online) you see these posts about Feminism and Career Success and on the other side (the reality) you are literally fighting amongst so many emotions and killing yourself inside. The worst part, it’s not because of you that you are in this stress.. It’s the people, the pressures they bring into your life. When will this stop?! I can go on and on ranting, but I know the next minute I post this I’m going back to the physics of life – trying to position my age and life stage at equilibrium. Byyee..

 

Image Source: disney.wikia.com

A little bit more.

Whatever you  do, you “need to be a little bit more”. I have been having this thought of how we are either being pushed or being told to ‘be a little bit more’. This is in regard to ‘a better you’ context.

Alright, in one way the idea is all about personal development and is for the betterment of your being, but what if that is just a social pressure that is silently damaging what we are as a person and our character. I’ve got no scientific research or philosophical proof of how exactly we are manipulated by our environment, but it’s obvious that we definitely are being pushed and pulled towards the perceptions of either individuals or the media.

Why do I have to listen to them?

It’s not even the general idea of being a better person – it’s the intricate details that these individuals and media go through. From the tiniest ways to live your life to get on a quest for major life changing decisions – why do you want me to listen to you? Why am I told to always be more than now?

 -No better you than the you that you are- (1)

Recent song release that got me thinking :

“No better you than the you that you are”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Em7vc8NWUNY

What you do is never enough.

Alright, so you come to a conclusion to change, just be a little more ‘open ears’ and listen to them. You understand their point and ‘try’ to change and you succeed too, but guess what, that’s not enough. You should do more. You should try harder. Apparently, the effort you made now is just tiny compared to what you should be doing – based on what the WORLD is doing. Why is that a concern – why are you telling me it should be MY concern? Can’t MY efforts be enough to satisfy MY goals? – nope, we just have to try harder.

“Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.”

The flip side

Remain calm, if it meant to be it will happen. Like, what now? After all the messages about trying harder and takings efforts to be better, now you tell me to just remain calm? Please media, make up your mind.

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On a serious note, I don’t think I can find an apt solutions to the weariness of this unbalance of having to ‘strive better’ and having to ‘be happy with at where you are’ – it does, of course differ based on your personal situation but the concern is – we are clung on to social media so much that before we start to understand if the message is personally relevant to us or not, we are already ready with conclusions.

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Until next time..xxx

Life hacks for that phase in life when everything falls apart! (Tried & Tested by me)

No this isn’t a depressing, negative and disorienting post. It’s just an acknowledgement to one of the phases in life. The not so good one! According to me there are 6 facets to life – Family, Friends, Love, Education, Health and Career. Imagine when all of them go wrong! That’s what this is post is all about.

Just FYI I’m not going through depression or any unlikely mental condition. Life can’t always be happy and exciting, hence the posts too. No one actually talks much about the downfalls in life. Many of the posts/articles/videos/pictures tell a story that explain happiness or joy the person is going through. Yes, that’s a wonderful feeling to share your good times with everyone. But that doesn’t mean they aren’t going through a rough patch. Everyone is surely tackling something that makes them sad/depressed/unhappy/regret and that’s pretty much the truth which is hidden in those happy stories they share.

But wait, It’s not so bad after all its pretty much a learning and testing of your patience!

I may sound like I have found inner peace with all this negativity. But NO it’s a big fail! The trick is to use this phase as a stepping stone to follow your passion. It’s about finding yourself and knowing what you are good at. I know it’s hard but fighting for what isn’t happening or complaining is not the way out. You are just making yourself believe you can’t do it.What has to happen will happen at its right time which is pretty unknown and frustrating. But such is life! (Yup! It took me some time to understand and believe what I just said)

I’m addicted to productivity in anything I do. And it feels worse when your mental health stops you from doing things you could be doing just fine on the other days. Best is to let those days be the most unproductive of all its okay you don’t need to work yourself out. You are your own boss! You define your ways –

Come in terms with the situation, see what you can do with the skills & support you have. There are going to ups and downs, so many days when you have zero level of optimism. Let those days be don’t worry about not being productive or being nice to someone. Just do what makes you feel happy, even if it is getting sun burnt at the beach all alone but you are happy at the end of the day.

Strike out your worries out one by one, tackle them one by one. Don’t think or try to solve all the worries at once you just won’t make it. Prioritize and combat!

Speak to your friends and family, Yup! You have to. How much we want to run away from them and not explain anyone what we need and want cause they simple won’t get it. But just try and you will have help right there waiting to solve your mess. Remember you just need their support not their approval (Sadly, I’m guilty of that!! Yet it’s WIP).

Workout – Physically & Mentally, The best!

Keep trying, be it your job, education, health or family you just have to keep trying. Surely at a different intensity everyday but even if it is an 2% effort to fix things you still got to get the ball rolling. Don’t stick with the past and be open to ‘Change’. You need it!

Lastly be thankful to what you have, more than often times we don’t look into the good side of life and only focus on things that aren’t working out and ultimately reach nowhere. Take a break, stop and look at all that little things you have in life that others don’t and be thankful for those.

I am still working on achieving what I wish to achieve in life. These hacks have helped me through the years, yet I still have those days with lowest motivation. But you have to keep working for yourself cause if you don’t no one will! PERIOD

~Shahana

Image Source: Giphy

Pictures from Paris

Well its been a while since I had been to Paris – to be specific it was in October 2015, but the memories of the place and the people are so fresh it’s hard to believe it has been four months already.

Time goes fast to realize and appreciate where we are – so here I am finally posting few pictures from the Paris trip.

Ideally, we went for for my brother’s wedding and yes there were loooooads of work preparing for the wedding, but so glad I could also do some sight seeing here and there.

Visit 1: the local market!

Yes of course Paris is known for it’s amazing views of historical sites, but my first visit? the local market! I was too scared to take my phone out to snap pictures of the market so just some pictures on the way.

The brick roads

Visit 2: Sacré-Cœur (White Church)

My first day using the public transport – and it wasn’t just one mode of transport. In one day I got on the tram , the subway and even the bus (can I also say I reached 13,000 steps that day!).

Above are some pictures from the bus. I love vintage buildings, sight of historical monuments (just to imagine the stories behind these monuments) and plain sights of a simple lifestyle – all seen in the collage above.

And finally the sight of the Sacré-Cœur! We didn’t expect the amount of crowd that day, but apparently it was because of a mini street concert happening. French songs being played, and people of all nationalities dancing on the streets quite a carnival effect there. Slowly we made our way through the crowd and up till the entrance. Once we reached we could see the view of the entire city – spectacular it was! (Unfortunately I don’t have a picture of the view here – surely will upload it when I find it). We had our share of one billion pictures taken (I’m kidding, we needed to save memory space) and so we headed over to some snacking (of course) for some fresh Churros.

Once we got done with the pictures and the snacking, we were ready to leave the place for visit no 3, but to a even greater surprise the mini concert suddenly played Bollywood /Kollywood songs! (Video of this later ) After that mini episode of excitement we were off to our visit no. 3.

Visit no 3 : the very iconic Eiffel Tower.

Getting to the Eiffel tower was an adventure. We basically took a longer route and had to wait for the bus and walk longer, just so we could get in time for the ‘lighting of the tower’- 8 pm to be exact. We spotted the lighting of tower from far and it was very beautiful. After which we walked closer the the ‘iron lady’. The place was too crowded and we had to wait in longer queue for the ticket to go up – so we skipped that and headed straight home.

The tower shimmers (seen on the right)

And so after a long metro ride, we caught the last tram and got back home just in time for dinner.

Hope you liked the post! Do comment and share your opinion on the post.

#keepwandering,

-Arunya

 

 

The day I met a newborn and a beautiful realization strikes.

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Saturday Morning, we met a family friend’s new born baby.
We’ve known her for quite some time, was even baby-sitting her first born for quite some time. Talking about the first born, we now get to know she is one mischievous little one, Those stories her mom tells about her mischievous acts on playground and supermarkets are so hilarious you might even even wonder if she is this high-profile ninja in-the-making.
So as we finally found our way inside the hospital and inside the room of the friend. Considering the many times we’ve visited a hospital – this was THE one time – I know I could be happy about the result –  that reason by itself had the ‘cherish-able’ feeling.
Once we finally found our way through the many rooms, we entered the room of our friend and her baby.
And then.. all I felt in the room was magic.
That same yet greater ‘cherishable’ feeling that cannot be reasoned based on scientific facts or religious beliefs.
A mere realization of how much process goes into the making of a life and more importantly when you understand how much power a woman has in bringing out a life that has been nurtured for around 280 days/40 weeks/ 9 months!
                     
(ps: discussed this with a colleague she suggested to to check this post – and it just adds the greater awe to this fact –  ‘Lennart Nilsson – A Swedish Photographer’s work’ – <http://www.unbelievable-facts.com/2014/03/lennart-nilsson-swedish-photographer.html> )
         (pps: please excuse the girl in her twenties realizing this flabbergasting fact in her head ATM!!!)
So, back to where I was…
After all that this woman has gone through in that amount of time, you see the smile on her face welcoming us in (how do they do it?!?) aaand more evidently next to her is a cradle in which you see those tiny pink feet popping out though the many layers of pink blankets.
Yep, I felt it.
Of course, there are many billion women and mothers who you have seen or experienced this by themselves or for their sister/friends/daughters- but maybe because this is the first time I’ve known a friend go through the same and so I felt it more.
What you may ask? That power of giving/creating life.
It may be just the nature of science or a blessing of how we are created – but it’s still one of those precious moments that enriches the experiences in our life.
Since it was the first time for me, it made me quite emotional – just the thought of how little our human minds maybe but there also exists a power superior to us that gives us, women the power to give life –  is it not beautiful?
A beautiful realization indeed. Those tiny hands and such pink skin.. This little one was inside her for 9 months and she is finally out to the world. The whole concept seems so magical – and only then you tell yourself – we humans are definitely not the limit or the end – there is a power superior to us, humans – again, some point towards science some point towards God. Whichever you would like to believe in, we as humans should be grateful for what we are than take our life for granted….and yet at times we do take it all for granted, don’t we? – Now that would be another discussion for later.
On that note, its over and out from,
Arunya

ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL – MOVIE EDITION #1

KEEP CALM AND WATCH A MOVIE! (2)

ANNIVERSARY SPECIAL – MOVIE EDITION #1

Hallo There! So it’s our One Year Blog Anniversary *fireworks emoticon* and we thought we would post a new type of a write-up. Something that most interests us. By us I mean our fellow Twenty-Something readers. And obviously it has to be Movies, all kinds of it. Our recommendations and reviews of recent and much loved movies list before you as a check-list to strike off and watch the space for more to come.

Our Preferred Friday Night Movies:

  1. Minions: If you need a time off from the real world and want to imagine little yellow talking bouncy creatures working for a badass Female villain. The Minions it is. You’ll end up falling asleep and dreaming about cute fuzzy things.
  2. About Alex: A light, friendship based movie with smart humor content. The movie’s script is based on how expectations take a toll on one’s relationships. Max Greenfield is fun and amazingly different from his New Girl Series character.
  3. Age of Adeline: Too imaginary yet still makes you want to finish the movie and know how it ends. And of course Blake Lively is as flawless as ever…
  4. Coco before Chanel: Not a new release, but I kinda like biographies and this one shows the early life of Chanel, which is pretty interesting.
  5. Morning Glory: I like how realistic this movie is in terms of depicting a life of a Media Professional and what they have to deal with at work and in their personal lives.
  6. Before we go: Only watched it because of Chris Evans. It’s the example of real life romance and not the usual movie script.
  7. Hot Pursuit: Almost a Chick Flick with some Gun Firing.
  8. Peace, Love and Misunderstanding – This movie would make you feel light-hearted with strong hippie feel and a confused yet simple understanding about family bonds.
  9. Descendants – Not much of a happy-go lucky movie – but if you want a movie to give you that feel of going to the beach without even heading out your front door – yep this is it.
  10. The Holiday – Ahh this is one of THE perfect chick-flick weekend movies. It has it all – the feel-good one with the funny moments and perfect for every girl. We Lovvee!
  11. 500 Days of summer – One of those beautiful movies that makes you wonder even after the credit gets rolling. A movie on love/friendship, being afraid to commitment and so the wise breakup.
  12. Fault in our stars – Yes, indeed it a movie of emotions in abundance. It may the teenage love that may make you feel squeezy – but nothing can beat the love with flaws – emotional and physical.
  13. Mona Lisa Smile – The queen movie to motivate a ‘family girl’ who wants a ‘career girl’ life. This movie speaks for itself and every girl – small town or city girl SHOULD watch it.

Afternoon Movies:

  1. Every secret thing: Reason this movie falls under the after-noon is because you don’t want to dream about kidnapping and killings. Yet it’s an interesting watch with some resemblance to the Hugh Jackman movie, The Prisoners.
  2. Gone Girl: Loved it but an after-noon watch for the same reasons as above.
  3. Jurassic World: Unrealistic yet liked the suspense and tension it created.
  4. Interstellar – A ‘’universal’’ experience when you watch this one. Yes, it may seem lengthy at times – but if you would really like to be wow-ed by pure science and the existence of the world (as we know it) – its definite must watch.
  5. Killers: Love the cast! Can watch it again and again and again.
  6. Lucy: I have a thing for women-oriented movies!

Movies we watched but weren’t so happy with:

  1. Aloha: Stunning cast yet the movie was almost a love story that took place at a war front. And yes Love wins!
  2. She’s funny that way: A disappointing end. It seems as if the script writer was confused with Owen Wilson’s hookups in the movie and just picked most senseless ending to the story.
  3. Accidental Love: Accidental Watch
  4. Cinderella: Bad casting and too English, dint go with the Disney feel (that’s what I would have preferred).
  5. Mortdecai: Johnny Depp was brilliant. And that’s all.

A Must-Watch Movie List, No Reasons Needed:

       Biography/Historics

  1. Little Women
  2. Big Eyes
  3. Woman in Gold

    Passion/Dreams

  4. August Rush
  5. Pianist
  6. A little Chaos
  7. Whiplash
  8. A Beautiful Mind

    Fantasy Adventure

  9. Lemony Snickets’s Unfortunate Events
  10. Sherlock Holmes
  11. Divergent
  12. Hobbit
  13. Life of PI

    Animation

  14. Brave
  15. Mulan
  16. Song of the Sea
  17. How to train your dragon
  18. Home

~Us

@hallothereblog

Lesson Learned : Magic no exist

Lesson Learned : There isn’t a magic wand tool in our world. No matter how hard or easy things get. We cannot swish a wand away to banish them off. They stick to you. Stick to you till you get down on your knees and surrender to solving this issue/s. They show you that it does indeed have the power of controlling you IF you choose to ignore it or pretend it does not exist – But yet, are you going to let it? Are you going to let it control you?Are you going to let it over power your mental ability to slash off this slavery to excuses? You’re thinking – well maybe because I have no choice – ‘No choice’ is such a cliche. Choices are there. They just aren’t the choices you aren’t willing to make. They aren’t just what you want to opt. It’s ultimately your decision – but here, here what are we doing now – are we just choosing to break lose or are we going to let the power of excuses grow onto us? 
 
In the more realistic world, I have a ‘let it be’ mindset. If some of you are like me then this is what we do – we trick our minds to believe that a magical world exists and that there is some magic somewhere that you might just stumble across that would change our minds and our issues – we read, we listen, we try to understand and eventually we choose to ignore, we distract our minds, we pretend they don’t exist – and eventually we let these excuses slowly gobble up the only time we have to prove our own minds wrong. 
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Our constant search for what is better – what can be improved, what ‘could’ be better is basically letting us fall into a phase of hope. Well, for beginners, yes hope is needed…but what if we have to keep hoping for things to get better – for good changes to happen.Then we wait. We wait and wait. Just waiting for too long and as time passes – you continue to hope.
Only when I stopped to hope it struck me wait, although I wanted and hope for change- what did I do to make the change? What was my effort in it ? Oh yes, I hoped  – so..is that all? I thought, don’t I want the hope shown as results..?
 
Look up at where you going than down hoping that magic still lies somewhere to show it self. No NO NO. You are your magic. The effort you put in to recreate your hope is the real deal.  No one else does it for you. No external power, no magical power…just YOU. 
Arunya

Pathways to your passion?

If only we had a formula to follow through our life… wouldn’t you think our decisions would be much easier to make?

Wouldn’t you wonder why can’t things be as easy as people say when they say “you know, life is just a simple process.. follow your passion and you will get through easily”.. OH, IF ONLY!

For me ofcourse, I would say my fairy godmother used too many colours to paint my freaking pathway.

Like seriously, my pathways are always confused with too many interests.. they are always vague, varied and versatile (alliteration! ha! :).  I cannot see myself focus on ONE  thing at ONE time, and they just EXPIRE withing weeks of just entering my dreamy-mind.

In any given comparison of people with people, I always saw two kinds of people on the pathway to their passion.

One, the extremely focused one.. will do one after the other since school, highschool, college or uni or work or masters and just on and on. Picks up long-term choices and aims to be committed and complete each of this long-term choices with their complete committment.
Then there is another who takes the next step as it comes and when it comes. They aren’t focused on one specific pathway, but they just pick up interests along their life, believe thatwhatever small choices they make in their pathway will somehow lead to a passion that they would love doing 5-6 years later.

While the first set of people, although they may be leading a standard yet continuing pathway, they are indeed used to being committed to one thing at a time, and so have less chances of feeling lost.

But unfortunately for the latter self, picking out those interests along the way isn’t as easy as it sounds, you could eventually lose interest and master the ability of not being abl to stay committed to one interest for more than a certain period of time.

Although these are the process, ultimately we look at the end result isn’t it?.. we will only dream about how and has the process led to that stage where you feel like the pathway was worth the final stage, right?

But the problem is… which process of the pathway is RIGHT? – the focused, committed yet standard (maybe boring) pathway to your passion OR the let-it-come-as-it-comes , fun, yet risky pathway to where you want to be?

Well, I am the latter (and now I need to stalk my fairy godmother and see why she hasn’t colour co-ordinated my pathways yet) .

All I can sum this up to is this folllowing quote :

” You are the person who has to decide. Whether you’ll do it or toss it aside: You are the person who makes up you mind, whether you’ll lead or will linger behind. Whether you’ll try for the goal that’s afar. Or just be contented to stay where you are”
Edgar A, Guest

Our life, Our choice. Choosing a pathway to your passion by far depends only on us, and our choices. Whether it’s a short term choice or long term, we can proceed in our pathway if we take the iniative to make these choices. There isn’t any fixed formulas to fill our lives with the passions we dream of.. its only made of the little choices we take the effort to make.

Cheers,

Arunya